The biggest regret of my life

Loosing my Mother due to Lack of Knowledge

Yes you read it correctly, I lost my mother due to cancer and partially I blame myself for not saving her life due to lack of knowledge of proper food nutrition. Here is my story –

My mother was extremely talented in music, singing, dancing and painting, in other words music and singing was her passion. Being a house wife and mother of two kids in a joint family, she still used to take out some time for her singing. She did some top notch certification course (don’t remember the actual name) as well in music in her early days and wanted to do something in this filed, but as you know almost 35–40 years back the norms were not so smooth for her or were not in her favor where she could live her life as she wanted or could do something which she wanted against all the odds.

But cutting story short, my mother ended up as house wife where she devoted herself completely to her family and kept living her music passion by singing religious songs often in small to mid size gathering and sometime in various public gathering very much like a professional (but without charging a single penny). Well my father supported her talent to grow and accompanied her in those social gatherings or events. But my mother always pursued this more like a hobby (passion) rather than career later on.

Everything was good in her life except her health. Ever since my childhood I found her surrounded by some or other medical problem and visiting doctor’s place quite often. Sometime it used to be small medical problems but sometime it was large enough to make her admit in the hospital. She was also suffering from claustrophobia, an anxiety disorder and some sort of depression too for which she was on continuous medication. In food she always used to prefer light food which should not make her stomach upset or create gastro problem at the end of the day. Since as kids we (I and my younger sister) were least aware of these medical things in the beginning and later on became busy in studies (& career development).

Also due to lack of knowledge in food nutrition space, I myself was not aware whether she was having proper regular nutrition rich diet or not. We can also imagine the treatment and advice from doctors in small town of Indian cities about food nutrition. I hardly remember a doctor who advised on diet or nutrition rich food ever instead of medicine. This is the biggest problem in India’s medical system that doctors do not care about food, diet, nutritions in any patient’s daily life routine, but the truth is that almost all medical problems (in early stage) can be well treated, suppressed or even fixed with proper diet and with well balanced nutritions in the food.

Eventually things became worst and my mother was diagnosed with multiple myeloma, a type of blood cancer at almost later stage of the disease. I remember her last days crystal clear when she was going through with chemotherapy, high doses of different medicines and severe pain caused by those medication process. It was utter most painful time for all of us and I can’t imagine how much pain she was going through each day. She fought with the monster for 1.5 years and never left hope till her last breathe.

Now after almost 4 years of her passing by and in my regular life routine, I somehow stumbled upon of having keen interest in body building. I started going gym regularly and started gaining knowledge about proper diet and nutritions by my own. Though in the past I had always been associated with some sort of outdoor sports like badminton, cycling, swimming etc. but never focused on body building and regular gym. After hitting gym, reading about diet, food nutrition and following diet plan, I realized how much is the importance of a proper diet in anyone’s life. What a miracle can be done by food if taken in right manner, as good diet can help building us desired shape of body similarly a proper nutrition rich diet can cure and prevent us from almost any kind of disease or better say prolong it for very later stage.

I wish I could have gained the knowledge of macro nutrition (carbohydrates, protein, fat) and micro nutrition (vitamins & minerals) and its effect of human body early. I wish I could have given proper food to my mother when she was lacking potassium, magnesium or zinc in her body and was given injections for them. I wish I could save her having joint pains or back pain by giving good balanced diet and by adding rich nutrients in her daily diet. I wish I could make her diet plans from morning till night and could add all those nutrients which were lacking in her body.

I also wish I could have introduced her to meditation as well when she was suffering from depression or claustrophobia. Yes I started doing meditation too since last 1–2 years to keep my mind calm and active in my work. In this age of social distraction, mediation is very important to keep our mind balanced with our body so that we can utilize our brain at its best potential. There is direct connection of healthy body and mind, as we do physical activity to keep our body fit similarly we should do mediation to keep our mind fit.

And don’t underestimate the power of nutrition rich diet. There is a famous quote by someone that body builds in kitchen and not in gym, this is 100% true and tested by myself on my own. I lost 8 kgs in 6 months with 6% body fat reduction and 2% muscle mass addition by following a good diet (keeping macro and micro nutrients balanced) and some regular exercise, now my next goal is to further reduce body fat and grow muscle mass.

But coming back to point, I regret that even being an educated person (masters in computer science), I could not save my mother from diseases and could not give a healthy life to her because I was uneducated (illiterate) in food nutritions, good diet, healthy body – mind & how to live disease free, healthy lifestyle knowledge.

As any other child I was very close to my mother. She was the most precious part of my life. Loosing my mother is the biggest regret of my life and also the biggest motivation too now to disperse the knowledge of proper nutrition rich diet to others so that they could save themselves or their loved ones from big diseases which don’t give a second chance sometime.

Ending my story here, this is the first time I am writing about my mother’s disease and her loss so openly on internet (my eyes are wet right now) and I hope people can understand the need & importance of good healthy food in their lifestyle and stop eating junk food (stop eating sugar right way, our body doesn’t need additional sugar specially that white sugar, its a slow poison).

This post was picked by a medium publication and have generated great responses from wise men.

I and my mother around 10 years back

I and my mother around 10 years back

A Journey without Gadgets

Recently I had the most amazing and relaxing journey so far I remember in recent time. Around a week back on my family vacation I did the most memorable flight journey with my son. Why this journey was so special and worth talking about it? How this journey was different from my past trips? Why do I want to share this with everyone? I am sure these must be the questions in your mind while reading this, I will answer each one soon but before that I want to share something which I read in a book before starting my journey.

One day before my trip to Lucknow from Bangalore I was reading a book and was impressed with one line sentence “Savour Your Environment To Live Your Life Happily“. This one line made a big impact on me and made me think that how many times do we miss the present moment which we are living in worry of future or in regret of past. We actually miss to live in the present moment whether we are having breakfast/lunch or dinner, drinking coffee, talking to our partner, walking in the garden/road or travelling with our family. Try to observe that we do not live in current moment, our mind is always busy in thinking about future or must be in memory of past. So I decided to give my best to live in present moment and see if I notice any change, do I enjoy the current moment, do I feel good.

A Journey Without Gadgets. Next day family vacation started from Bangalore. I did my packing previous night which include all my gadgets; camera, phone, Ipod, Kindle, macbook, ear phone, selfie stick and other essential items required in the trip. Our first flight was from Bangalore to Lucknow and I decided to use this time with my family and specially with my son (Adi), this was Adi’s first flight when he can actually enjoy it, his all previous flights were mostly in his mamma’s lap or in stroller. Adi’s curiosity is increasing day by day as he is growing. I wanted to live this moment with him.

I saw my son’s reactions on almost every thing whether its Uber ride till airport, putting luggage on airport trolly, getting into the gates, passing a smile to police person, getting his boarding pass and so on. The moment I got into the Uber cab from home, I stopped checking my phone and during whole trip first time I did not use any gadget. Generally I browse songs on Ipod to listen my favourite playlist, clean up my phone by deleting old messages, docs, notes. I also browse offline videos or read books on my Kindle. But this time I just savour it every bit with my family. I savoured everything around me; Adi’s naughtiness, my coffee at airport, my fellow co-passengers and much more. I saw one lady must be in her sixties looking out her window in airplane, she was smiling alone quite often. Sometime she used to stare outside window for a long time and in between she used to smile; may be she was also savouring the present moment and her time alone, remembering good old days or may be she is excited to meet her loved ones at the end of this flight. Even without knowing her or talking to her I was happy to see her smiling. Someone has truly said that “happiness is hidden behind small things around you”.

My son Adi did not sleep for a single moment during whole journey and so did I. He was curious to know every thing around him; tray table, seat cover, seat handle, push button, seat belt, window shutter, light above his head, aircraft sound, crew announcement, pilot announcement, food served and so many other things. He asked so many questions and I just savoured that moment. I was smiling on his curiosity and his reaction on every answer.

Anshul Johri and Adi

I must say that this was the most amazing flight journey I had so far. I generally hate boring flight journeys; sitting at one one place, hearing same kind announcements, seeing same hand gestures of crew members. I used to plug my ear phones the moment I used to enter in flight, but this time it was different, I did not realize that I was sitting at same place and almost same sitting posture for last 2.5 hours. And when I landed in Lucknow (capital of Uttar Pradesh, a state in India), I was very relaxed, my mind was like I took a long deep sleep though I did not sleep a bit. Whole journey my mind was busy doing something at that moment. I asked my self why I am feeling so relaxed, light and fresh; because I lived in present moment, no thought about past, no worry about future, no phone, no music, no Kindle, no any other gadget. I lived in that moment with my son and family. I savoured the time, the meal, the journey and the place.

Art of savouring; give time yourself to savour the environment around you. When you are drinking a coffee; don’t just drink it while checking your emails; instead savour the coffee and its flavour. Savour the environment around you while drinking coffee, see the people around you. Savouring helps in relaxing your mind, it helps in keeping you in present moment, living the current moment and focusing on present thing. Its one kind of meditation where you focus on only one thing at a time, just one thing which you are doing in current moment.

in Life | 940 Words

40 Proven Tips for Happy Healthy Life

Happy and healthy life is just not about earning good money and working out in gym as many people think. Happiness is nothing related to money and working out in gym is no where related to health. Though both are equally essential in life apart from other factors. Imagine what will you do with lots of money when you don’t have time or health to spend at the end and similarly what will you do with good toned body unless you do not have a good soul to live life with. So to live a happy and healthy life you need to be good from inside and outside both. By doing small changes in your daily routine life you can bring tremendous amount of positive changes in you which will help you in achieving a happy and healthy life.

40 Tips for Happy Healthy Life

Health:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time for prayer and reflection
6. Play more games outside.
7. Read more books.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.

Personality:
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day —- and while you walk, smile.
11. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t over do; keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don’t have to win every argument.

Community:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right things.
33. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. Forgiveness heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, don’t take it for granted – embrace life.
39. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not least:
40. Enjoy LIFE!

in Life | 561 Words

Success Mantra – Slow down your mind

Every day more and more people are becoming depressed and unhappy with their lives. The reasons are many: amongst them are financial worries, work related problems, family problems, weight issues, health issues etc. Your mind is running fast, is disturbed and is not focused on the job. Have you ever observed your mind? Just observe your mind, is it running fast, thinking so many things at a time and because of that you are unhappy right? Have you ever observed that whenever you are happy, your mind is always calm focusing only on one thing that time, that happy moment. So it means the solution of your problem is slowing down your mind. What happens when you slow down your mind? You become happy, yes happy.

Slow down your mind, if you truly want to be successful.  Its called slowdown therapy. Lets see how can you slowdown your mind –

Slowdown Therapy

  • Slow down; you are not responsible for doing all by yourself and right now.
  • Recall a happy, peaceful time experienced in your past. Be there in that moment, rest there.
  • Set you own pace. Do not run and try to compete with every other person with you.
  • Take nothing for granted, watch the water flow, wind blow, corn grow.
  • Savour the taste of your food.
  • Notice the sun and the moon as they rise and set. They are remarkable for their steady pattern of movement, not their speed.
  • When you talk with someone, don’t think about what you will say next. Thoughts will spring up naturally if you let them.
  • Talk and play with children. It will bring out the unhurried little person inside you.
  • Create a place in your home, at your workplace and in your heart inside you where you can go for solitude and recollection.
  • Allow yourself time to be lazy and unproductive some time. Rest is not luxury, its a necessity.
  • Be in your present and just feel the things which you are doing right now.
  • Talk slowly, talk less, don’t talk. Communication is not measured by words.
  • Give yourself permission to be late sometimes. Life is for living, not scheduling.
  • Take time just to think. Action is good and necessary, but it’s fruitful only if we muse, ponder and mull.
  • Find time for play or any thing which you like to do.
  • Watch and listen to night sky. It speaks.
  • Listen to the words you speak, specially in prayer.
  • Learn to stand back and let others take turn as leaders. There will always be new opportunities for you to step out in front again.
  • Divide big jobs into little jobs.
  • When you find yourself rushing and anxious, STOP. Ask yourself ‘why’ you are rushing and anxious. The reason may improve your self understanding.
  • Take time to read.
  • Direct your life with purposeful choices, not with speed and efficiency. The best musician is one who plays with expression and meaning, not the one who finishes first.
  • Take a day off alone.
  • Work with your hands. It frees your mind.
  • Take time to wonder. Without wonder life is a mere existence.
  • Sit in dark sometime. It will teach you to see, hear, taste and smell.
  • Once is a while turn down the lights, the volume, the throttle, the network, the invitations. Less can be more sometime.
  • Take a walk without any destination in mind.
  • Count your friends. If you have one you are lucky. If you have more you are blessed. Bless them in return.
  • Count your blessings – one at a time and slowly.
  • Meditate daily.
in Life | 592 Words

20 proven ways to improve yourself and being positive in life

Everyone has negative and positive phases in life, its just that we think that positive time remains for a short period while negative time stays longer with us. There is nothing like negative or positive time. Its your attitude towards current time. Someone wisely said that life is 10% of what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. Life is all about journey with ups and downs. As in any journey there are always some pleasant moments and there are some non pleasant moments so this is what life is all about. But still if you think you are going with non pleasant time and it feels like you lost your positive energy and motivation to react, its not too late to get up and change non pleasant time to pleasant time. This article is about being positive in life and proven ways to improve your life. This is based on my personal experience and here is my attempt to summarise it in points (not in any order).

  • Read a book everyday: Reading a book everyday opens your mind and thoughts. Its a practical way to give some time for yourself and do think beyond your daily routine life work. A good read of 15-20 pages in a day changes your perception and your thinking. Start with a good positive and motivational books.
  • Pickup a new hobby: Pickup a new hobby which could be anything like cooking, art, writing, reading, teaching, public speaking, sports etc. This activity helps you in finding more ways to think, becoming creative and applying your brain. Experts say picking a new hobby boosts your brain by 30% and helps you becoming more productive in any work.
  • Meditate daily: Meditation helps you in removing negative thoughts from your mind. Daily mediation improves your brain power and thinking. Meditation is a continuous process, start slow with 10 mins daily routine and gradually increase it to 30 mins. Here is my personal experience with meditation and how it helped me in overcoming stress from my life.
  • Create an inspirational room: A good inspirational quotes & posters from your favourite authors, personalities, leaders or even from your parents can help you in becoming positive when you feel low. Create a room for this or a table/desk where you can sit calm and just read those quotes at times.
  • Wake up early: A good daily ritual helps you in becoming more productive. Start your day little early so that you have enough time to think about the day and plan your things accordingly. One hour less sleep from your routine can add huge benefits in your daily routine tasks. Great personalities and leaders around the world follow this practice. Few names include Barack Obama, Tim Cook, Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Narendra Modi, Jack Ma, Jeff Bezos etc.
  • Exercise daily: Take out some time to do any sort of physical exercise daily. Physical exercise is not only important for your body but it also helps your brain stay sharp. It is scientifically proven than regular exercise increases brain functioning which eventually helps in generating positive thoughts.
  • Write a journal everyday: Make a habit of writing every day. It could be anything from your personal blog or public blog, personal thoughts or experience, any good moment of the day, your achievements or your learning at the end of the day. Writing helps in achieving positive way of thinking. Your brain starts functioning fast when you write.
  • Create a to-do list: This is my favourite. Make sticky notes your best buddy. Create a to-do list of things which you need to focus or complete. Divide things in buckets or different lists. Things or tasks which need to be completed immediately, an other list which consist long terms tasks planned in 1 week/month or year. A handy to-do list makes things easy to focus on. Keep visiting your to-do list time to time to make sure that you achieve tasks in assigned time frame. Everyday I create a to-do list of things which need to be completed today.
  • Identify things which are not in your control: This is result of creating a to-do list. While writing down your tasks or problems you will realize that there are lot of tasks or problems which are not in your control and you can not do anything to avoid or remove them so why to bother about them. Focus on those things which are in your control and finish them, once you do focus on things which are in your control and take right steps to finish it, you will realize that eventually you have finished those things as well which were not in your control. Its human tendency to focus 75% of their time to those things which are actually not in their hands.
  • Listen podcasts or watch inspirational videos: This is a good way to kill negative thoughts and boost your positive energy. Make a list of inspirational podcasts and videos. Listen those audio, learn from your favourite influencers.
  • Avoid negative people: Its always good to be social and surrounded by good and positive people. Negative people always pass on negative thoughts and energy. Identify those people and try to avoid them and their company. This is also one of the best way to reduce negative energy around you.
  • Spend less time on social networking sites: Social networking sites are good way to kill time and being non productive. These days social networking sites are flooded with junk information and sometime baseless & false information. Try to reduce time spent on these sites. These sites are good way to get connected with people virtually but limited usage of these sites save a lot of time and sometime reduces negative energy around you.
  • Build your network: Further adding to my above point, its good to build your own network offline. Instead connecting with people virtually try to get connect offline. Meet offline with positive people, discuss and exchange some good thoughts. Try to diversify your network, get connected with folks from other domain (you area of work), talk to them on various topics. This is a very good way to learn quick good habits and thoughts from your network.
  • Stop watching TV: Similar to social networking sites, TV is also one of the top most source to kill your precious time. TV serials, news, reality shows all are flodded with negative energy merely for the sake of TRP (Television Rating Point) every show on TV is flooded with junk content. No one is working on creating a value.
  • Start a 30 day challenge: This is the best way to start a new thing. If you want to adopt a new habit or a new hobby or want to remove a bad habit, take 30 days challenge with yourself. Make a list of dos and don’ts and work regularly without fail for 30 days, believe me you will see the difference. For example start with mediation (a new habit), just do it for straight 30 days without fail. You will feel a big difference inside.
  • Get a mentor: This is also one of the most important factor in grooming yourself and being positive in life. Imagine mentor as your personal gym trainer, who answers your questions, works with you to tone your body and advices you time to time. Similarly have a mentor in your personal, financial, educational, professional, spiritual domains.
  • Be kind to people and help often: Be kind to people around you, help them often. Help could be in any form.
  • Take a break: Take a break from your daily routine work to rejuvenate yourself. A good and well spent break with your family or friends helps to remove negative energy around you. A time away from technology, mobile, gadgets, social media and city life helps you getting back your peace.
  • Spend time with your loved ones: Your family needs you, they need your time. Speak to them regularly, a time well spent with family helps you getting away with negative thoughts around you. Play with your kids quite often. Talk to your parents often. Sit with your wife or your loved one.
  • Play a sport: Play any sort of sport regularly. Playing a sport not only gives your physical strength but also gives you sharp mind. Adopt a sport in your life based on your choice, some people love cycling, badminton, tennis, squash, football, basketball or even running. Be it any but do it on a regular basis.
in Life | 1,408 Words